Half Shelled Heart (Oyster Cove, #2) Read online

  I’m not sure how to answer. “It needs work.”

  “You like working with your hands. Just look inside. We can make it work. My parents said they’d give me ten grand for a down payment.”

  “Really?” This is the first I’ve heard, although they’ve been pushing the idea of us getting married on me since we first started dating. If it weren’t for their direct hints, I probably would have held off on asking her to marry me, not because I didn’t want to do it, but I just like to do it on my own terms.

  I take Leigh’s hand and let her lead the way into the home. The realtor greets us at the front door, opening it so that we may walk around. We enter into a foyer. On the left is a dining room. The only way I can tell is the large chandelier hanging down in the middle of ceiling. To the right is what appears to be a living room. I can see cable wire coming out of the wall where the television used to sit. The place is empty, giving me a better idea of what I’ll need to do to the structure if we decide to purchase the home. I take in each room, surveying the cracks in the ceiling, or any other damage that would warrant a further inspection. We walk to the rear and find a family style kitchen with a large space for a table. A sliding glass door looks out into the long backyard. “How much land?” I ask.

  “Two acres,” the female realtor replies. “There’s also an adjoining lot on the right hand side that’s for sale. It’s seven more acres that backs to a forest conservation and a nearby dairy farm.”

  A half bath sits in the hallway as we approach the stairs leading to the second floor. The realtor stays put while we explore the rest of the house. Three bedrooms are situated neatly, with one full bathroom in the mix. There’s a claw foot tub, toilet, and double vanity. Leigh climbs into the tub. “Isn’t this fantastic? We can both fit in here. Think about late night bubble baths, some wine, a little music.”

  I smirk. She knows how to persuade me. “I can see the potential. It seems to have good bones. We could move in and do the work as we go. I’m sure the guys would pitch in, especially since it’s pretty close.”

  “See. I told you that you’d like this one.”

  “I like the property. I think I should look into the land next to us, if the price is right.”

  “It’s a foreclosure. I don’t know anything about them, but we could move in quickly once we get approved.”

  Getting approved for a loan isn’t a problem. I’ve saved a lot through the years, and my credit is damn near perfect. “How much is the house?”

  “Get this, it’s only one hundred and twenty thousand. My dad says with your income we should be able to afford at least double that amount. Plus they want to give us money to help.”

  “It would help more if we saved the cash for the renovations. For ten grand we could redo the kitchen and bathroom upstairs.” I’m feeling excited, which surprises me. I didn’t think seeing a house together would change my opinion. Leigh isn’t trying to push me. She wants this because she wants me.

  “I think we should put in an offer. Let’s see if we can get this place. You’re right. It would be great for us. We can make it ours, have a couple kids, maybe even an outside dog or two.” My arms wrap around hers as she climbs from the tub. She’s elated with joy, and I know once we get back to her apartment she’ll reward me. I enjoy making her happy. For the first time in a week I’m optimistic we can make it work.

  Upon checking out the attic, and the crawl space, I let the realtor know we’re interested in putting the offer in, pending a inspection by a professional. We’re informed the paperwork will be ready to sign by the next morning, and head back to the island.

  Since we’re in two separate vehicles, I call my dad during the short ride back.

  He picks up on the second ring.

  “You caught me in between jobs, son. What’s up?”

  I take it he’s driving into the restaurant after working on the water with us for a large order we needed to fill. I’d guess he went home to take a short nap to prepare for an evening rush.

  “Hey, I just left Leigh. We looked at a house in Snow Hill. I think I’m putting an offer on it.”

  “I thought you said you didn’t want to move off the island.”

  “Yeah, I didn’t, but I need to come halfway for Leigh. It’s not fair to keep her here. This way she’ll be closer to school. Do you think I’m making a bad decision? It’s the reason I’m calling you. I’d appreciate your advice.”

  I hear my dad pausing before giving me his answer. I know he’ll tell me the truth, even if I’m not going to like it. “Can I ask you a question without you getting defensive?”

  “Yeah.” I have no clue what he wants to know.

  “Does this have anything to do with a certain woman coming back to town?”

  I sigh heavily, not even worried if he hears it. “Of course you’d ask that.”

  “I know what that girl meant to you, son. Coop told me about your run in with her at the bar. You obviously care enough to want to protect her. I’d rather you not make a compulsive decision if it’s based on running away from feelings you may still have but refuse to face.”

  “I’m engaged to Leigh, Dad. Jamie doesn’t mean anything to me. I was keeping her from damaging her reputation by hooking up with Coop. I thought she was married.”

  “She is, or was I suppose.”

  “Huh?”

  “Her uncle told me she was getting out of a bad marriage. She moved here alone, Brant. Did you hear a different story?”

  “No. She led me to believe she was still married, that’s all. It doesn’t matter. I’m not interested in rekindling an age old romance. We don’t even know each other anymore. I’m happy with Leigh. This move is something we’ve been talking about for months, way before Jamie moved to the island.”

  “Well then I think it’s a good decision. Make sure you get inspections done. Is it a newer home?”

  “Actually, it’s an old foreclosure, and I’ve told the realtor we wanted a full inspection to be safe. I’d like you to ride over to look at it with me in the next few days, before I sign any papers.”

  “Sounds good. I’ll help with whatever you need.”

  “Thanks, Dad. And thanks for asking about Jamie. I know everyone thinks I’m going to fall apart, but I’m fine. Really, I am.”

  “I hope so. If you’re not, you’re going to have a lifetime of regret.”

  I get that my dad has a newfound way of thinking because he’s married and happy again, but his life isn’t mine. I didn’t think of Jamie once when we were looking at the house. That has to say something, right?

  Chapter 9

  Jamie

  Avery is watching me look over the documents. Being legal papers, they’re pretty easy to read. By signing my name I’m officially filing for divorce. The sooner I get it over with the faster I can move on with my future.

  It’s been hard, starting over again, a place to live, new job to run, but I’m doing it. I’m staying busy. Avery is the biggest blessing I could ask for. She’s been convincing me to go out and enjoy the fall weather. We have happy hour drinks and dinner a few times a week when she’s not attending night classes.

  On the nights I’m alone, I cook for the neighbor, or read romance novels that let me live out fantasies I’ll never fulfill on my own.

  “I can’t believe it’s come to this. If someone would have asked me a year ago if this is where I’d be, I’d tell them they were crazy. I thought we had it all.”

  “What happened? You never really talk about it.”

  It’s hard to bring myself to talk about what happened with my marriage. “Let’s just say I was married to someone I thought I knew.”

  “That’s so vague.” She pulls the papers away from my reach, forcing me to look her in the eyes. “Seriously, Jamie. You been here for a while now. He doesn’t call. You’re not crying every five minutes. Joan speculates, but we both know she’s full of shit. Set the records straight. Spill.”

  “I wanted a child,” I start. “
I’d been asking him to look into buying a house with more property so I could have animals and foster. When I found out I was pregnant I knew he said he didn’t want children, but I thought he’d change his mind. I figured if he loved me he would love something we created together.” I’m already getting choked up. The idea of what happened still sickens me to the core. “I waited to make sure, eight weeks in total. Then I planned a fancy romantic dinner, filet minon, grilled asparagus, roasted red potatoes, all of his favorites. I lit candles and waited for him to arrive home, so elated I could hardly contain myself. He came in the room in such a great mood. I told him we were celebrating life. We’d just finished eating when I showed him a sonogram picture. I thought he was going to choke to death. In that moment the man I fell in love with disappeared. He went to bed refusing to speak to me. That next morning he told me I had to get rid of it. His exact words. It.” I shake my head and wipe away the tears streaming down my cheeks. “The silent treatment went on for weeks, and when I confided in my parents it only made matters worse. He called me every name in the book, threatening our future if I didn’t terminate the pregnancy. He told me he never wanted children. He said marrying me was a mistake.”

  “So what happened?” She’s asking because there is obviously no baby.

  “I lost the baby at seventeen weeks pregnant. I had to be hospitalized and deliver it through a procedure.”

  “I’m so sorry. That’s when you left him right?”

  I shake my head. “No. I wish I had. I loved him. I thought that in time he’d change his mind. I figured in a couple years I could bring it up when we were more settled. One month after my miscarriage I was going over the bills. There was this statement from his doctor’s office, so I opened it because sometimes they make appointments for physicals and such. Come to find out the bastard had a vasectomy behind my back. I had no clue. I didn’t even notice a change in him.”

  “Holy shit. I’d leave him too.”

  I finally nod. “We had it out. I told him I was leaving him. He didn’t fight me about it. It was clear we no longer wanted to be together.”

  “I’m sorry I asked, Jamie. That’s sad.”

  “That’s not even the tip of the iceberg. I packed up all my belongings and drove from New Jersey to the island that next day. Upon arriving I get a call from his sister, who he apparently tells everything to. She told me he’d gotten an abortion pill and slipped it into my meal the night before I miscarried. She said he was cryptic about it, like he was playing it off, but later after I’d lost the baby he admitted to it. She’s a mom, so she felt like she had to tell me to clear her conscience.”

  By this point I can barely speak. It’s one thing to live it, but to retell the heartbreaking story again cuts deep. “That is horrible. Oh my God. I can’t even imagine what you’ve been through.”

  “This was a man I trusted wholeheartedly. I wanted to be with him for the rest of my life. It’s why I don’t talk about it. I want to pretend it never happened and move forward, because dwelling in what I can’t change eats me up inside.”

  “I bet.”

  “So now you know why I need to sign these papers.”

  She slides them back in my direction. “Don’t let me keep you any longer. I hope you’re taking him for everything he’s got.”

  “On the contrary,” I say as my name is scribbled on the designated line. “I don’t want a penny from him. He can keep it. I hope he lives a long lonely life. If I never saw him again it would be too soon.”

  “You really have bad luck with men, don’t you?”

  A little laugh escapes me. “Yeah. Don’t I ever.”

  My conversation with Avery seemed to take some unwanted stress off of me. It has been so long since I’ve opened up about the reason I left everything and started over. It was nice to get it off my chest, and also to allow Avery to know the truth, instead of what old Joan assumes.

  For the next several weeks life gets easier. I’ve managed to come up with a good routine. I’ve painted two more rooms in the house, and with the help of a gardener, I’ve had a small pond installed in the backyard for the local ducks to have a safe place to frolic. When the weather gets warm again I’ll fill it with feeder fish so they can feed while they bathe and float around. As far as getting some indoor pets, I’ve been thinking of a puppy, but they require a ton of work and training, and right now my time is thin. I’ve considered rescuing an older dog, and even called the local shelters to see what’s available. I need a pooch that’s good around people and all other animals, so that he or she will be able to come into the clinic with me while I work. My uncle had a yellow lab that he took everywhere with him. Her name was Sam, and she had a bed behind the front desk. Whenever someone would come in the door she’d get up to greet them. At one point he had treats for the visitors to feed her, but she started gaining weight from eating too many snacks.

  I want that kind of companion. I need someone who will love me unconditionally. I need a cuddle buddy. I’m giving up on men, because my track record doesn’t allow me to assume something good is out there waiting for me. I thought I had the perfect man, but he turned out to be a horrible person.

  I’m lonely. So lonely I want to reach out and feel the love of a man, but I know it’s not possible, because I’m not the type of person to act on lust. I require more. I want to experience love, and all the feelings that come with it. Nonetheless, I’m not ready. I can’t allow the pain to overcome me again. I refuse to let another person hurt me. I’m not made of steel. The human emotions can only take so much before the person loses the desire to keep moving forward. I’ve been crippled by an endless agony. I’m afraid to open my heart again, thus leaving me in this empty state.

  A little later in the day I decide to go to the grocery store to pick up a few items. I’ve filled my cart halfway by the time I see him entering through the mechanical doors. When our eyes meet I quickly look away. This is the last place I want to run into Brant Wallace, so I high tail my way to the register in order to check out and leave.

  When I get to the parking lot I notice his truck is parked near where my bicycle sits. I place my groceries in the baskets, and hang the rest of the bags on the handles. It’s only about two blocks from my house, so I’m not worried about the extra weight. I begin to climb on when something rips through me. Mind you, I’ve had a terrible day. Talking about my marriage has left me with a bitter taste in my mouth, enough to make me want to give Brant another piece of my mind.

  So I wait.

  He comes out of the store unknowing I’m waiting for him. His unsure grimace tells me he knows I’m about to speak. “Jamie. I thought I saw you.”

  “Yep. Me in the flesh. I suppose we need to get used to running into each other.”

  He places his bag in the truck while answering. “Not for long. Looks like I might be leaving the island soon.”

  I have no idea why this effects me. It shouldn’t, but I feel overwhelmed with sadness. “Wow. I never thought I’d see the day.”

  “Well, my fiancée goes to school in Salisbury. We found a house in Snow Hill.”

  “You’re buying a house together.” I don’t say it like I’m asking. I’m reiterating so it sinks in. “That’s a big step. Congrats.”

  “So how are you? Am I allowed to ask, since I’ve been accused of stalking?”

  I shrug. “I’m fine.”

  “Can I be honest?”

  “Are you ever honest?” I counter.

  I can tell he’s not happy with my comment. “You know, you’re wrong about me. I did and said things I’m not proud of, but I’m not the monster you assume me to be.”

  “Liar and cheater comes to mind first. You said it yourself. I was some game to you. Obviously you’ve turned over a new leaf. Good for you. I hope you treat this woman with the respect she deserves.”

  “I’m not a cheater,” he starts. “I never cheated on you.”

  “How can you stand here and say that?” I’m getting defensive, be
cause I know what he said to me all those years ago.

  “Okay, I have lied to you, but not in the context you’re thinking. I didn’t cheat on you. I only said I did so you’d leave me alone. And furthermore, I only wanted you to leave me alone because I couldn’t cope with what was happening in my life. It was a dick move, and I’m only telling you this now because I’m sick of seeing that hateful face every single time we see each other. I deserve to be called an asshole, a dickhead, a liar, but not a cheater. Those two summers meant something to me. You showed me what love felt like, so much that when it came time to say goodbye to my mother I was stricken with grief I couldn’t control. I didn’t want comfort or support. To be honest, I don’t know how the hell I managed to make it out in one piece. I regret what I said to you, what I did, but you wouldn’t have wanted to see me fall apart. It was ugly. I wasn’t anyone you could have wanted to be around.”

  Then it hits me like a ton of bricks. Maybe for a few brief moments back then I considered this was the cause, but he was so adamant. Not even his brothers would talk to me about it, which led me to believe I was just another notch in his bedpost.

  He’s rendered me speechless, and while my cookie dough ice cream melts away in the bag, I’m fighting the urge to burst into tears. Then it starts. My eyes burn, forcing me to look away. I can’t let him see how emotional I am, because it’s not all because of this conversation. “I’ve had a terrible day already, Brant. I can’t do this right now.”

  He taps on the door to his truck and flinches, before shaking his head. When I look up I can tell he’s trying to read me. “Well now you know the truth. If it weren’t for my mom falling ill we could have made it work, Jamie. I know life goes on and all that shit. You kept living, and I finally learned to open up again, but that doesn’t mean my life has been great. My biggest regret is hurting you. Hell, I still have nightmares about it.”

  I’m starting to climb on my bike again; because the sooner I can get away from him the better it will be when I break down. “I can’t listen to this anymore.”